Of Onsens, Peeping, and Green Beasts
by Kitkat973
Summary: Really, all Iruka had wanted was to take a nice, peaceful soak. How could he have known that his former student's teacher would be at his usual spot?


**(A/N):** Found this old fic on my harddrive and figured I'd share. From a request for drabble prompts months back that ended up going a bit long. Hope you enjoy!

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Iruka had a well-established routine of going to the onsen every Wednesday, after weapons practice with his class. Dodging projectiles sent flying by thirty pre-Gennin, of which generally only one or two had the slightest clue of what they were doing, would make anyone's muscles tense. The heat of the hot springs was perfect for relieving the tension, and his back twinged in sympathy at the thought of sliding into the steaming water.

He was so distracted with thoughts of slipping into the onsen and finally being able to relax that he didn't notice the sounds until he was already undressed, with only a small white towel slung over his hips for modesty. A choked gasp made the teacher frown and step forward toward the fence separating the dressing room from the spring – he'd spent too many years watching over children as they swam to not respond to a call for help when there was water nearby. Just as he was about to step past the fence, the gasp turned into a strangled moan, and the teacher's cheeks went red.

Was that- was someone really? He bit his bottom lip and shook his head. No, no one would – but there was another gasp again, followed by the slick sound of skin against wet skin. The teacher took a step back and hurriedly turned to leave, when a low mumble caught his ears and made his cheeks flush even brighter.

"Mmm, teme… that's a much better use for your mouth."

Iruka blinked and looked towards the hotspring, confused. He could've sworn that the low voice was familiar, but he shook his head again, trying to get rid of the idea. There was no way his students – but the dark laugh that followed the comment was familiar, too familiar, and against his will Iruka found himself pressed against the wooden fence, peeking through the knothole. It couldn't be them, it was impossible – and he'd prove it, by taking a glimpse and then leaving and forgetting the idea that his ex-student and honourary little brother would possibly do something as perverted and just –wrong- as getting a blowjob from Uchiha Sasuke in the onsen.

Unfortunately, the scene that met his eyes was exactly what he had expected. He wondered in a brief moment of insanity when Naruto had packed on that much bronzed muscle.

"Maa, Sensei, I didn't know you were a peeper," a lazy voice drawled from behind him. Iruka's eyes widened and he nearly jumped out of his skin, coming into contact with a solid and decidedly bare chest.

"K-k-Kakashi-san, I didn't- I wouldn't-"

The Jounin smirked, and Iruka got his second surprise of the day with the revelation that he could actually see the man's lips curl. He blinked and wondered briefly if he'd fallen asleep on his desk, because that was the only explanation for a world in which Naruto and Sasuke were sleeping together and Sharingan no Kakashi, perverted Jounin and well-known bastard, was so… well… pretty. The white-haired man tilted his head to the side slightly, smirk growing even smugger, and placed his hands on either side of the fence, trapping Iruka against the wood.

"What had you so fascinated that you didn't even hear me enter, hmm?"

Iruka was tempted to warn him, to somehow pull him away from the scene of the crime, but didn't. After all, if he had to see it, it was only right that someone else be scarred for life with him. He tried to not concentrate on the warmth of Kakashi's skin as he pressed against his back, leaning over his shoulder and peering through the wooden slats.

He could feel the moment that Kakashi saw them through the sudden tensing of his frame and the expansion of his chest as he sucked in a quick breath.

"Are those two doing what I think they're doing?" Kakashi asked, not pulling away from the view. Iruka nodded dumbly, and Kakashi let out a low whistle.

"Well, that explains why they've been fighting less ever since Sasuke returned," he said. Iruka squirmed and tried to pull away, but Kakashi simply tucked his chin tighter against the Chuunin's shoulder, not tearing his gaze away from the two boys – well, adults now really, but Iruka couldn't help think of them as boys.

"You shouldn't watch them," Iruka hissed underneath his breath. Kakashi chuckled low in his throat, but quietly enough to not be heard.

"You'll have your turn to look again soon enough, Sensei. I wouldn't ruin your fun," Kakashi said.

The vein in Iruka's forehead twitched and he grabbed the Jounin's wrists, tugging at them and reversing their positions. The way Kakashi moved with the motion told Iruka that he was allowing the Chuunin to manhandle him, but he was too angry to care. Iruka pinned the pale wrists against the wood above the Jounin's head and leaned in, staring into the single revealed gray eye.

"Those are your students. You will not watch them having sex," he growled low in his throat. The smirk returned, playing across the Jounin's lips and forcibly reminding Iruka again just how damn –pretty- the man was.

"I didn't realize you were so dominant, Iruka-kun," Kakashi purred. Iruka's eyes narrowed and he stepped in closer, crowding the Jounin.

"Do you have to make everything into a comment about sex?" he asked. Kakashi shrugged, a slow ripple of muscle beneath pale white skin.

"Well, when you're pinning me like this…" he trailed off suggestively, waggling his visible brow invitingly. Iruka snorted in disgust.

"You're such a per-"

"KAKASHI! I HAVE FOUND YOU AT LAST, MY RIVAL!"

A blur of green rushed into the room, coalescing into Gai, thumb extended in a classic Good Guy pose.

"It was quite the task to find you, but now that I have, we can move on to the real chall-"

Gai blinked his enormous, round eyes, finally taking in the situation. His gaze flickered from Kakashi's bare face to the Chuunin holding him against the wall.

"…Oh. I did not realize that you were already occupied in Youthful Pursuits!" he exclaimed, flashing a bright smile. Iruka resisted the temptation to bury his face in his hands, but just barely.

"Kakashi! You should have told me that you have found the Flower of your Youth!"

The lazy bastard had the gall to merely shrug in response.

"Gai, it's not what it looks like-" Iruka started to explain, but the Green Beast didn't give him the opportunity, instead charging him and swooping him up in a hug. For a moment he wondered if Gai realized exactly how awkward that would've been if he and Kakashi had actually been doing what he thought they'd been doing, but the bone-crunching grip on his ribs made thinking hard.

"If you hurt him, I'll kill you." The whisper was soft against his ear and filled with deadly intent, and it made Iruka stiffen in surprise before Gai set him back down on his feet. The man's face showed no sign that the warning had taken place, and he beamed at Kakashi.

"Yosh! If you have found your Special Person, I shall find mine as well before the end of the week! If I do not, I will run five thousand laps backwards around Konoha on one hand!" Gai exclaimed, and burst out of the door. Iruka blinked after him, then looked at Kakashi, wondering how the Jounin managed to stay sane with a best friend like Gai.

"Maa, Sensei… you know, Gai isn't the best at keeping a secret. And since the entire village will now think we're sleeping together anyway…" Kakashi drawled. His visible eye took on a predatory glint, and he padded toward Iruka on silent feet. The Chuunin gulped, looking around the room for any possible method of escape, then his eyes fixed on the fence in front of him.

"NARUTO! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!" he screamed at the top of his lungs. Instantly there was a loud splash from spring, and seconds later a drenched and fully erect blonde appeared in the middle of the room.

"Iruka-sensei? What's wrong?" Naruto growled, eyes darting back and forth for any sign of threat. Over his shoulder, Iruka smirked at Kakashi. It served the bastard right.


End file.
